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    Categor More Jokes
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    The Joke
    Home - A -
    Age Jokes

    "That's an
    excellent essay for someone your age," said the English
    teacher.

    "How about for someone my Mum's age, Miss?"



    "Welcome to
    school, Simon," said the nursery school teacher to the
    new boy.
    "How old are you?" "I'm not old," said Simon. "I'm nearly

    new."



    Miss Jones agreed to be interviewed by Fred for the school
    magazine.
    "How old are you, ma'am?" asked Fred.
    "I'm not going
    to tell you that," she replied.
    "But Mr Hill the technical teacher
    and Mr Hill the geography teacher
    told me how old they were."

    "Oh well," said Miss Jones. "I'm the same age as both of them."
    The
    poor teacher was not happy when she saw what Fred wrote:
    Miss
    Jones, our English teacher, confided in me that she was as old as
    the
    Hills.



    "Now remember, boys and girls," said the science
    teacher, "you can
    tell a tree's age by counting the rings in
    a cross section. One ring
    for each year."
    Fred went home for
    tea and found a chocolate roll on the table.
    "I'm not eating that,
    Mum!" she said. "It's five years old."



    Grandma:
    You've left all your crusts, Fred. When I was your age I ate
    every one.

    Fred: Do you still like crusts, Grandma?
    Grandma: Yes, I do.

    Fred: Well, you can have mine.



    How old is your
    wife?
    Approaching forty.
    From which direction?



    An
    eminent old man was being interviewed, and was asked if it was
    correct
    that he had just celebrated his ninety-ninth birthday.

    `That's
    right,' said the old man. `Ninety-nine years old, and I
    haven't an
    enemy in the world. They're all dead.'

    `Well, sir,' said the
    interviewer, `I hope very much to have the
    honour of interviewing
    you on your hundredth birthday.'

    The old man looked at the young
    man closely, and said, `I can't see
    why you shouldn't. You
    look fit and healthy to me!'
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